10.  The Man Who Knew Too Much-This film stars James Stewart and Doris Day.  It won an Oscar for that song that everyone seems to know, Que Sera, Sera, whatever will be will be.  I’m not a fan of that song, but it gets into your head and you can’t get it out.  That aside, it’s a clever story about a family who goes on vacation in Morocco, then stuff happens.  There’s kidnapping, disguises, and Doris Day plays a former famous cabaret singer who gave up her career for her family.  (She seems a bit bitter about it if you ask me, but back in the day you kinda had to grin and bare it.)  This movie is shot is a zillion locations, and makes you realize you don’t travel enough.

9. Lifeboat- This movie stars alot of people, but the standout is Tallulah Bankhead. Every sense-able woman, and glorious dragqueen wants to be her.  As a super fan of the tv program, Survivor, I love that this movie is about people stranded on a lifeboat after their ship gets shot down during the war.  If being thrown together out to sea in a tiny space with no food, water, shelter, and other annoying people during WWII isn’t enough, add a Nazi soldier to the mix. 

8. Strangers on A Train-I saw the Danny Devito movie, Throw Mama From the Train, another adorable film, many moons ago and Devito based his murderous plot to kill his mama on the “crisscross” model seen on, Strangers on A Train.  Farley Granger is Guy Haines, a tennis star who wants a divorce from his trailer trash, cheatin wife, who won’t comply, and Robert Walker plays Bruno Anthony a guy who hates his overbearing father, and wants him out of his life, permanently. Basically, it’s two dudes (naturally they are dashing, handsome, charming, and nicely dressed) who meet on a train and jokingly decide to commit a murder for the other person, hence the crisscross, so that there would be no motive tying each of them to the murdered person.  I’d love to see this one remade actually. In Vanity Fair they had a photoshoot with Emilie Hirsh and James McAvoy as these characters, that would be perfect casting.  

7. Dial M for Murder- The enticing Grace Kelly plays a cheating wife.  I know, shut yo mouf.  It’s true.  Ray Milland plays her cockholded tennis star husband, and Robert Cummings plays the writer/other man.  Milland hatches a plan to have his wife bumped off, and of course it all goes wrong.  Don’t you hate it when a plan goes awry? 

6. To Catch a Thief-Grace Kelly and Cary Grant seem to be the go-to actors for Hitchcock, and as glamazons, you couldn’t do much better.  Women and men love Kelly, and women and men love Grant.  Especially men.  This movie is set in the South of France, so even with the volume turned down you’d enjoy this movie.  Grant plays a cat burglar, a cat burglar!  When the profession took planning, and balance, and skill, and rope, and safe-cracking abilities, and hardly anyone got shot.   You had to do research and scope out the joint before you slipped the diamonds into your socks and went on the lam, and sold the jewels on the black market and retired to Greece. Unlike today where crackheads steal your flat-screen for a rock. No work ethic. I kid. I kid.   Anyways, Grace Kelly is her usual stylish, articulate, pretty, self.  And there’s a masquerade party involved which only means more fabulousness.

5. Vertigo- I have a soft spot for James Stewart. Hotness. Anyways, Stewart plays a cop who has gets dizzy when faced with heights.  Kim Novak co-stars in this psychological thriller.  Beautiful sets. It makes you want to take a walk in the country.

4. North By Northwest- The handsome Cary Grant, and the lovely Eva Marie Saint star.  This is the movie with that iconic poster of Grant trying to outrun an airplane as it chases him across a field.  Who does that? I’d have just gotten run over. So so awesome.   

3. Psycho- Probably the second most famous Hitchcock film ever.  The popularity of the name Norman (Bates) declined when this movie came out.  Everyone knows when you hear that music…..inght…inght….inght….watch your back, cause your ass is about to be shanked!  Janet Leigh, a 1960’s milf, and also Jamie Lee Curtis’s mom, became famous for that shower scene.  The leading lady of a film was never the first one wacked in a movie until it was done in this one.  Drew Barrymore adopted this technique in Scream and it rejuvenated her career.  I also quite enjoyed the Vince Vaughn adaptation, but, Hitchcock’s one is so, so, much better.   

2. The Birds- Probably the most famous of Hitchcock’s films, starring Melonie Griffith’s hot mom, Tippi Hedren.  I would have picked this as #1 had there been more then one wardrobe change.  Sorry, I’m shallow. But it’s such an awesome film, it makes you wary of those flocks of sparrows you see having bird summits on telephone wires.  I know what you’re up to birds. You’re not peckin me to death!!

1.  Rear Window- Starring the legendary James Stewart, and the entrancing Grace Kelly.  This movie has everything you’d expect from a Hitchcock movie.  The movie is a typical Hitchcock suspence film, but it also focuses on the animal magnetism between an ice princess and a handsome, but, not overly Brad Pitt-type handsome, charming man (who is clearly waaaay below her in social, economic status, but she loves him anyway), which is also nice to watch.  Also, there’s a Harper’s Bazaar shout out, not too shabby. 

1.  Michael Phelps - So what if he got caught taking a hit off a bong!!  Who hasn’t!?!  That only makes me love him more.  I mean seriously remember his awesome abs.  Beautiful!!!! 

2.  Seth Myers - Love Love Love Seth Meyers!!!  He’s adorable.  I watched SNL this weekend and this clip is what placed him at number 2.  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D1ENW1m40sk

3.  Chris Martin - I’m watching the Grammy’s right now!!  Look at that face!!! 

4.  Johnny Knoxville - He’s gone down this week only because I haven’t seen any episodes of Jackass or Wildboyz.  So he’s slipped to # 4. 

5.  T.I. - Again watching the Grammy’s right now.  Oh My God!

 

1. David Beckham

2. Cristiano Ronaldo

3. Ricardo Kaka

4.  Freddie Ljungberg

5.  Milan Baros

6.  Thierry Henry

7.  Florent Malouda

8.  Andrea Pirlo

9.  Paolo Maldini

10.  Sergio Ramos

 

20.  Will Smith

19.  Big Boi

18.  Soulja Boy

17. Eminem

16.  Ice Cube

15. Beastie Boys (all three)

14. Q-Tip

13.L’il Wayne

12.  Nelly

11. Bow Wow

10. Method Man

9.  Snoop Dogg

8. Ludacris

7. LL Cool J

6. 50 Cent

5. Andre 3000

4. Common

3.  Mos Def

2.  Rakim

1. T.I.

1.  Andre Agassi- This dude was on every sexy list of the 80’s…mullet and all. Rock on Andre.

2.  Boris Becker- German, smoldering….nicknamed Boom Boom, Der Bomber, and Baron von Slam, and that’s on the court.

3. Pete Sampras-  Such a pretty, pretty face, and last of the super hairy chests.

Now to the Finalists…

10. Tommy Robredo

9.  Novak Djokovic

8.  Feliciano Lopez

7. Mario Ancic

6.  Andy Roddick

5.  Marat Safin

4.  Richard Gasquet

3.  Robby Ginepri

2.  James Blake

1.  Raphel Nadal.  DUH?!  Was there any doubt? 

1.  Johnny Knoxville - To all you ladies that have been writing comments saying that Johnny Knoxville should be number one, well you are 100 percent right!!  He should be!!!  I’ve been watching a lot of Jackass reruns lately and seriously, what was I thinking!!! Mr. Knoxville deserves the number one spot.  He is sooooooooo hot!!!!  And I personally think he as getting better as he gets older. 

2.  Robbie Williams - Actually he really should be in first place with Johnny Knoxville for the number one spot, but hey what the hell!  He is super hot and has an up to no good grin that is very sexy.  If you don’t agree with me on his super hottness just watch any of his music videos. 

3. Tyson Ritter - O.K. I’m not really a fan of this guys music, but I really think Tyson Ritter is really hot.  I secretly watch All American Rejects music videos every time they come on MTV just to look at this guy.  Anywho, he is making this list because I recently saw All American Rejects cover of Britney Spear’s Womanizer and it rocked!!! 

4. Chris Pontius - I love this man so much!!!  I love Jackass but Wildboyz is my absolute favorite show of all time.  I really hope that start making more Wildboyz shows soon.  He’s adorable!!!

5. Rich Cronin - Rich Cronin was on the Howard Stern Show last week and he was funny as hell!!!  I listened to his segment at least 4 times on reruns.  He has to be one of the best guest ever.  Rich really needs to get his own radio show!!! 

*A special note: Seth Rogan would have made this list but now he’s getting all buff so….no list for you Seth! 

*Also, honorable mention goes out to Artie Lange who would have been way up this list if he were to ever comb his hair, change his clothes, or get off drugs, cause he’s handsome, and funny, and rich.

Now to the finalists.

10.  John Belushi-Original cast member of SNL, star of Animal House and Blues Brothers.  He’s the gold standard that every overweight comedian gets compared to. Hilarious, adorable, and he sings and dances, always a plus.

9  John Goodman-Forget the dad he played in Roseanne, although he was sweet, it wasn’t his best look.  Early 90’s grunge band members aside, no one looks good in flannel.  However, few men can make the villian more appealing then the hero.  Think Barton Fink, The Big Lewowski, Evan Almighty, O Brother Where Art Thou….who doesn’t love a bear?  This guys hottness is under-appreciated. 

8.  Jack Black-The second triple threat to make the list.  Musician, Comedian, Actor, and strangely alluring.  You actually believe that he could win Kate Winslet’s heart.  He’s also got that weird thing where his eye brows move independently.  Awesome.

7.  Forest Whitaker- He gained 50 pounds to his already plump frame for his Oscar winning role in Last King of Scotland.  Forest makes you feel ashamed that you thought his portrayal of a merciless dictator was kinda sexy.  Obviously he’s a kick ass actor, but, he’s also the director of Waiting to Exhale, one of the few fabulous movies out there starring women. 

6.  Jon Favreau-He was hot in Friends as the bored rich dude who becomes a UFC fighter for kicks.  He was hot in Swingers a film he both wrote and co-starred in with ten pounds too light to be on this list superstar, Vince Vaughn. And finally, he was the director of last years best movie Iron Man.  I mean he made Gwyneth Paltrow seem… not uptight. 

5.  Orson Wells- This is a list of all time, and he was so talented, so confident, so hot.  Citizen Kane.  Look at it again before you start calling me names.

4. Jackie Gleason- No. I am not crazy.  Watch, “The Hustler.”  Jackie’s engaging portrayal of Minnesota Fats  makes you tear your eyes off of Paul Newman which is damn near impossible.  It’s true.

3. Marlon Brando- Block the Island of Dr. Moreau from your mind….think of the good films Brando made as a chubster, The Godfather, Don Juan Demarco, Apocalypse Now, Superman.  He makes you want to peel grapes and feed em to him. Brando R.I.P. you sexy chubby thing you. 

2.  James Gandolfini- Two words. Tony Soprano. Nuff said.

1. Jack Nicholson -  Has it been 3 years since The Departed came out?  Jack still has it.  He’s always had it.  Even if he weren’t a brilliant actor, Jack would probably still have his way with the ladies.  I don’t think there’s a woman alive this man couldn’t charm.   Say what you will, you know you’d tote his heavy golf bag around in 108 degrees, using those stupid mini towels to wipe his sweaty brow, or light his cigars just to smell his breath.  Rock on Jack.         

2.  Johnny Knoxville - Johnny Knoxville will always be on my super hot guy list.  Just look at that face!!!  He’s just hot!!  Not only is he hot, he is probably one of the best dressed men out there.  No matter what he does he always looks like he just finished having a quickie.  He is soooooo hot!!!  Jackass RULES!!!!

3.  Terrence Howard - Need I say more.  He’s just awesome!!! 

4. Christian Camargo - I just saw the first season of Dexter a few weeks ago.  It’s a damn great show!!  But one of the reasons I looked forward to watching the entire first season was this guy!!  He is so damn hot!!!! 

5.  James Stewart - I know what you are all thinking, but after seeing the movie Destry Rides Again you just have to put Jimmy Stewart on this list.  He was so cute!!  Who knew.  The movie was great too!!  So go rent it from your netflix to see what I’m talking about.